Etiquettes of Conversation

MUFTI MOHAMMAD ANWAR KHAN

One of the most beautiful moral aspects of Prophet Muhammad’s life was that he always spoke the truth. He spoke when he had to, and always with a purpose. His language was always polite. He would smile while speaking and there was a sweet tone in his speech. His voice would be moderate and he never uttered harsh or ridiculous words and in the process hurt the feelings of others, as some people do in their daily lives. The same moral merit has been given a great amount of significance in the Holy Qur’an in which Almighty Allah has rendered an extremely polite way of _expression. That is why the words for “copulation” have been mentioned in different styles and expressions in ways that avoid crudity in the Arabic language, and with much openness in uttering words and phrases, which are well known to the people reciting the Holy Qur’an.

Most significantly, our Prophet (saws) would, always, preach the most serious teachings with delicacy and in allusive terms and avoid speaking about difficult matters and questions exclusive to women on account of his modest nature and polite disposition. At such occasions, Ayesha, his most beloved and pious wife, would convey problems faced by women to him in order that he may present solutions for them without hearing them from women in a direct way.

Muslims should take a lesson from the life of our Holy Prophet (saws) and always speak in a noble and dignified way. The Holy Prophet (saws) has strongly advised Muslims not to spoil their tongues with foul language. He has advised Muslims against speaking ill of others and not to indulge in backbiting, abusing, slandering and carrying tales etc. However, there are many Muslims who gossip, backbite, use a lot of dirty words, and obscene utterances in their daily conversation, both in public and in private, and converse with each other in an impolite way, crossing all the limits of modesty and decency.

Today, we also find people chatting on the Internet cutting across international borders where they, intentionally, use many ridiculous, outrageous, and senseless words in excessively unpleasant and unacceptable sentences, which also include words with sexual suggestions and overtones. Such acts are terribly dangerous in both, moral and Islamic perspectives.

Every one should try his utmost to shun such detestable conversations by adopting a civilized manner of expressing words, so that a psychologically, socially, and religiously healthy community of people could be brought about throughout the world.

In fact, such kinds of problems, immoral and detestable activities must be dealt with in a direct way. Chatting in a vulgar language on the Internet, reading absurd storybooks full of obscene words and passages should be avoided totally for they kill modesty, politeness, and dehumanize the readers and considerably affect their moral character.

Ayesha (ra) reports, “It was not the nature of the Prophet of Islam to talk in an indecent manner, nor did he engage himself in the use of foul language.” (Shamail-e-Tirmidhi)

Abu Saeed Al-Khudri (ra) relates, “The Prophet (saws) was more bashful than a virgin in her veil.” (Shamail-e-Tirmidhi)

Prophet Muhammad (saws) has also said, “Modesty is one of the branches of Islamic faith.” (Muslim)

Therefore, let the Muslims across the world ornament their moral character with the most beautiful standard of speech, and modesty, and adopt a decent manner in every thing they say or do, following the way of our Prophet (saws).

(Mufti Anwar Anwar Khan can be accessed at: anwarkhanqasmi@gmail.com)